In high school, I was an uber nerd. I lacked a social life, I had a feud with a teacher about whether India was in Asia (it in fact is, but he still doesn’t think so), and I cared what the popular kids thought. By the end of senior year, I stopped giving a crap about what anyone else thought of me who wasn’t me.
At graduation, I was beyond relieved that I wouldn’t have to deal with such immature pricks again and that in college there would be others like me, we’d have fun and never have to change for anyone because college was college and everyone was mature.
Um…right. That idea was so delusional I should’ve added that I’d see unicorns around the grasslands waiting to escort people to class.
Most of you probably had an idea of what college would be like for you and you’ve even built upon this fantasy over the summer. I certainly did. Here are five things that are absolutely true about college; if you haven’t already, start to build your fantasy around the facts:
1. You might not be funny.
As soon as you tell a joke, everyone will start talking extremely loud and you won’t be heard. However, one lone person will hear you and they’ll then repeat that joke and go on to be a celebrity around campus.
2. Your roommate could be your best enemy.
Oh, you thought you’d be best friends with your roommate? That may not be the case. You’ll try oh-so-hard to be friends with your roommate but your efforts could be in vain. The good news is that you can get back at them by not sharing what the homework is for that one single class you share.
3. You’ll learn what you learned in high school was wrong.
No, whoopie pies did not originate in Pennsylvania, and you’d better learn that fast before you get placed on academic probation.
4. The freshman 15 is nothing but a myth.
No, you’ll gain the freshman million—but don’t worry, there’s company.
5. Procrastination is killer.
Don’t procrastinate… it’s bad.
In the end, the concerns of high school still exist in college.
Trust me, I’ve been a college student for four days now.
Questions? Email Briona at email@example.com.