By Max Pearlman, Staff Writer
From the moment I got to campus — scratch that — from the moment I got into college, there has been a stigma associated with having a girlfriend. Before coming to F&M, everyone, from my family to my friends, said something along the lines of, “Max it cannot possibly work,” regarding letting my current relationship persist in college. One of my best friends from home even texted me saying, “I’ll give it until Thanksgiving.”
Seriously people? When did being in a relationship become such an impossible task? It’s not like I’m doing something crazy here. It’s strange to watch people claim to know better about a relationship they aren’t even in. But I digress. I will try to point out the myths that all of my friends believe and show how they are, frankly, wrong.
Myth number one: When a guy gets to college (me) he will become a cheater automatically because of all the temptation.
Since I got here, I have been to parties — and I suppose there were many opportunities there — but the main point here is that they were opportunities, not temptations. Anyone who uses the excuse “well there were just too many temptations” is an untrustworthy person in the first place.
Myth number two: You will grow apart with your girlfriend/boyfriend because of the long distance. While this myth has a lot of truth to it, it also depends on the commitment of the two people involved. I have seen long distance ruin many strong and stable relationships, but, if two people really care about each other, this should not be a problem. Just schedule times to talk to each other and make the effort to reach out as much as possible to remind your girlfriend/boyfriend you are thinking about them.
Myth number three: It’s more fun to be single in college than to be in a relationship. This is definitely the one I have heard the most. People tell me that I have been “missing out” on all the fun and that, if I was single, I would really be getting the “college experience.” First of all…no. Second of all, I would like to point out that not all people are the same.
For some people being single is what works best for them; they aren’t ready for or do not want a relationship. But for others, such as myself, I prefer being in a relationship. I find the rewards to be much more satisfying, and it makes me happy.
For all of you out there who are unsure about being in a relationship with somebody at a different school or back home, let me ask you a few questions. Do you really care about this person? Can you trust yourself to be faithful to yourself and your girlfriend/boyfriend? Why did you start dating this person in the first place? Was it for emotional or physical reasons? If you answer yes to those questions and if you started dating for emotional reasons then odds are you can stay with them in college.