Contributing Writer

In order to get a glimpse of the increasing chaos that is actor—no, no, artist—Mr. Shia LaBeouf, one need glimpse at nothing more than the dazzling diorama a simple Google Images search will turn up.

Here is the fresh-faced, potential-packed Disney star, officially an up-and-comer, a “One to Watch.” Here is said star, soaring onto the covers of magazines and into the leading roles of massive productions. Here is that star armed with one pretty girl, with a different pretty girl, with them both.

Here is that star in an altercation at a Walgreens. Here is that star sporting no longer his youth, but rather a mountain-man, hermit-esque, hair-and-beard combo reminiscent of a scruffier Joaquin Phoenix—along with a haughty glint in his eyes that seems to beg you to ask how expensive this haircut was. Here is that star, holding a porcelain duck.

Here is that star, wearing absolutely nothing. Whoops, there he is again. And there, ladies and gentlemen, is the life of Shia LaBeouf, corralled nicely in a .25 second search.

The actor who may still remain in many of our minds as the lovable scamp Louis Stevens has gradually taken a sharp left turn in his career path, moving from family (Even Stevens, Holes), to mainstream (DisturbiaTransformers), to meltdown (thrown out of a Walgreens, two bar fights in one year), and then to art, fulfilling what is perhaps some kind of circle of life among artists or child stars.

LaBeouf proudly told MTV News that in director Lars von Trier’s upcoming film, Nymphomaniac, he will be doing precisely what it is a nymphomaniac does, but without any movie magic or simulated action.

“There’s a disclaimer at the top of the script that basically says, ‘we’re doing it for real.’ And anything that is ‘illegal’ will be shot in blurred images. But other than that, everything is happening,” LaBeouf said of his foray into what is obviously an edgy, high-brow affair.

But according to recent news, LaBeouf is nobly doing something other than attractive actresses for the sake of his sacred art: he is also doing acid. In an interview with USA Today, LaBeouf regaled reporters with his tales of drinking actual moonshine on the set of the newly released Lawless, as well as taking a tab of LSD for the freshly wrapped The Necessary Death of Charlie Countryman. LaBeouf explained his rationale to reporters, stating that, “There’s a way to do an acid trip like Harold & Kumar, and there’s a way to be on acid.” The best way to be on acid, LaBeouf thusly concludes, is to be on acid.

And here we have the artist formerly known as Shia LaBeouf, a child star turned art house quasi-porn star, a blossoming actor who has put away childish things and taken out LSD. He may not be logical, he may not be clean, and he cannot be stable, but I still like to think that somewhere, somehow, he would make Louis Stevens proud.

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