By Abigail Glickman || Onion Dip Editor

Speaking from someone who has never seen an episode of Euphoria, I feel I can justifiably express my opinion. The way this show has my for you page in a CHOKEHOLD is horrifying. If I have to scroll through another video of “ did you catch the slight change in Cassie’s baby blue eye shadow to periwinkle?!”. No. No I did not and I couldn’t care any less than I already do. No one cares that much and I can confidently say no one noticed because why would we? We are here to watch a show, not analyze the meaning of the colors or the motifs. The people only want to see the next Maddy comeback or Nate explosion. It’s not that deep. We are already in a pandemic: we don’t need an epidemic too…

It is not just the show itself that is taking over, but it is the fans that truly scare me. They are probably the biggest hypocrites I have ever met. They use this show as a crutch to justify their actions. They think that this show is the scapegoat for every bad thing they do. Like no, don’t drag my good sis Zendaya into this. I didn’t want to have to bring this issue online, but it has gotten to the point where her name is being dragged in the mud (you better get this reference). 

Either way you were going to dress like the only piece of clothing you own is two sizes too small. Either way you were going to blackout tonight. Don’t say “omg it’s okay though, I’m literally Maddy guys”. Because no, she would rather be caught dead than wear those basic, black leather pants that every girl seems to flock to for their going outfit. She would not leave the house looking like she just learned how to do makeup from Zoella’s video. And she actually has the standing to back up her outfits: she will come right back at you. While every girl is too nervous to say “yes, wearing your hair in a ponytail does make your forehead look too big”. She actually has some class unlike everyone else. But the worst girls are the ones who use Cassie as their justification. No. You have been eyeing your best friend’s ex for a while: it was only a matter of time before you betrayed girl code. Just because you saw it on TV doesn’t mean you be the true jealous b**** you are. Own up to your actions and realize that you are just a bad person.

At this point I am in too deep of not watching the show, so might as well continue the trend. I hope this offends people into humbling them xoxo.

Sophomore Abigail Glickman is the Onion Dip Editor. Her email is aglickma@fandm.edu

Photo courtesy of reddit.com

By TCR