By KT Thomas || Satirical Columnist


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In response to the rumors circulating campus, Fraternity president, Westwood Vanderbilt III, called a press conference on Wednesday in the middle of Hartman Green to clear the air. Here, amongst a sea of pledges, Brothers, and some confused locals who wandered too far from the dog park, he bravely announced that he is not, in fact, sexist because he watches Broad City.

To prove his point, he then marched back to his room lined with ripped out Maxim pages, turned on the show, and proceeded to laugh uproariously any time a male character spoke.

When asked his favorite part of the show, he responded, “I really dig the parts where they’re getting dressed to go to a party…wait, I’m no perv or anything. It just really gets me thinking about the s**t chicks go through to look hot for us when they get to the house. Now Workaholics… that’s a show!”